Addiction Kills

Rachael Christine Schlingmann 9/21/88 – 8/10/12

Ten days ago that phone call came.  The one that you receive which delivers information your brain cannot register.  My sister was dead.  She died of a catastrophic heroin overdose which only means she ingested too much heroin for her body to handle at one time.

I haven’t spoken to my friends about it because they were all present for the last traumatic death in my life.  They were all lucky enough to watch, front row, when my mother was killed and I decided then that I would never grieve publicly again.  I don’t want to see the sad faces, I don’t want anyone to cry for me or to pity me, I don’t want my Facebook page to be on fire with condolences.  I sincerely appreciate that people care about my well-being.

I knew my sister was an addict.  It’s impossible to explain the helplessness I felt when I watched the priest close the lid of the casket for the last time.  As we stood graveside and they lowered her casket into the grave I felt such sadness.  It was not supposed to work out this way.  This was not the plan.

It was gray and almost rainy.

Rachael Schlingmann Memorial Fund

I love you sister.


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